All-American Rejects: Dirty Little Secret
I hate being deceitful. Lying is one of the worst things a person can do to me. Being lied to hurts me more than most anything. It may childish, but it is how I feel. Lying by omission is not much better. Covering up the truth to avoid the consequences is not good either. I expressed, just last night, to my boyfriend JUST how much I hate lying. And today I get asked this? Are you serious? No. I won't be your dirty little secret. I am not going to hide that I am your friend. I won't hide it, I won't. So I guess that means we can't be friends.
loooove losing my best friends over and over again. who's next?
Saturday, September 3, 2011
Thursday, August 25, 2011
All we have is this life...
Colbie Caillat : Dream Life, Life
...so make it be what you want :)
Well, summer is over and it is time for another year of hard work. More accounting, finance, economics, and Alpha Phi. Rush is coming up, next week, and I am excited for it. There are so many cute girls who want to rush.
The past two weeks have been a little bit of a roller coaster. From considering quitting something that I love, to reconnecting with a few people who have been missing from my life. It's weird, actually, having a void filled when it has been empty for so long. I am not sure how to handle it, but I can't complain.
Life is coming together and falling apart at the same time. It's like im suspended mid air, not sure of whether I am about to fall or soar.
...so make it be what you want :)
Well, summer is over and it is time for another year of hard work. More accounting, finance, economics, and Alpha Phi. Rush is coming up, next week, and I am excited for it. There are so many cute girls who want to rush.
The past two weeks have been a little bit of a roller coaster. From considering quitting something that I love, to reconnecting with a few people who have been missing from my life. It's weird, actually, having a void filled when it has been empty for so long. I am not sure how to handle it, but I can't complain.
Life is coming together and falling apart at the same time. It's like im suspended mid air, not sure of whether I am about to fall or soar.
Friday, July 15, 2011
Last Chance
Nicki Minaj: Last Chance
My goodness. I always make a mess of things.
To you, the wonderful guy who has held my heart for such a long time, I am sorry. You know that I am. I love you so gosh dang much. I've known that you are the one that I want for far longer than I'll admit. This distance is harder on me than it used to be. I am still trying to find a way to cope with missing you this much. I am sorry, again and again and again. I just hope you havent given up on me :/
everybody makes mistakes right? losing you would be the biggest one i'd ever make.
My goodness. I always make a mess of things.
To you, the wonderful guy who has held my heart for such a long time, I am sorry. You know that I am. I love you so gosh dang much. I've known that you are the one that I want for far longer than I'll admit. This distance is harder on me than it used to be. I am still trying to find a way to cope with missing you this much. I am sorry, again and again and again. I just hope you havent given up on me :/
everybody makes mistakes right? losing you would be the biggest one i'd ever make.
Monday, July 4, 2011
Light Up The Sky
Yellowcard: Light Up The Sky
Today, we celebrate our Independence day. Today, we light fireworks. Today, we gather with friends and family for loads of fun.
Well, the 4th is one of the most important days of the year for me. It, along with December 5th, is one of many days in my past that have shaped who I am. The 4th will always be special, simply because of the holiday. But for other reasons, it is a day that means much more to me; the 4th is like Christmas and Thanksgiving to me. It is a day for family. But it is also a day for a special visit and avoiding bad memories.
Today makes 9 years that you have been gone. I was in 5th grade when you saw me last. I think of you all the time. I wish you were able to see who I am today. I wish you could see where we are all at. I still wish that you had somehow been able to hold on through the night. Most of all, I wish you were still here with us. We'll visit your grave, today, like we do every year.
I love you, Bobby. I will always be your Little Miss Piggy. I miss you.
HAPPY 4th OF JULY!!!
Today, we celebrate our Independence day. Today, we light fireworks. Today, we gather with friends and family for loads of fun.
Well, the 4th is one of the most important days of the year for me. It, along with December 5th, is one of many days in my past that have shaped who I am. The 4th will always be special, simply because of the holiday. But for other reasons, it is a day that means much more to me; the 4th is like Christmas and Thanksgiving to me. It is a day for family. But it is also a day for a special visit and avoiding bad memories.
Today makes 9 years that you have been gone. I was in 5th grade when you saw me last. I think of you all the time. I wish you were able to see who I am today. I wish you could see where we are all at. I still wish that you had somehow been able to hold on through the night. Most of all, I wish you were still here with us. We'll visit your grave, today, like we do every year.
I love you, Bobby. I will always be your Little Miss Piggy. I miss you.
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Hot 'N Cold
Katy Perry: Hot 'N Cold
Well, the past two days have been interesting, to say the least. and ALL thanks to this little thing:
Yes, a thermal coupler. Thanks to this wonderful thing, my Friday and the rest of the weekend was changed.
First, my Friday was supposed to be simple. I was supposed to wait for the guy to come to fix my windshield, hang out with my little, and go to a play with Chelsea Lee. Simple, right?
Now, I will explain how things really went. Well Thursday night, my littles and I stayed up talking until about 6 am, and i followed that up by talking to my wonderful boyfriend until 9 am. I then, unknowingly, fell asleep. (really, I did not realize i fell asleep until I woke up). At 1 pm, I woke up. This is nothing out of the ordinary. What was out of the ordinary is that when I went to shower, the water was ICE COLD. and refused to heat up. UH OH!! So, as any daddy's girl would do, I ran to my phone and dialed up my fathers number. And, of course, daddy said he would come to my rescue. I am running around my house, cleaning, while I wait for the guy for my car. As I am doing so, I realize that my AC will not turn off (by this time my house is around 65 degrees and I am freezing). So, I call daddy again and he says he will bring up a new thermostat when he comes up for the water heater. As I am rushing around getting things done, I realize that a) my little is coming and with everything going on there was no way to BBQ and have fun like we planned and b) i had yet to go pick up my tickets for the play. YIKES! So since my parents were going to come up, I thought it'd only be right to not go to the play (I am utterly depressed over this. 2 years now missing the plays). So Chelsea and I ended up cancelling our plans. The guy fixes my window (horrible job, but that's another story) and I am able to finish up all other errands that I had to do. PHEW! As things settle down, my little arrives. We walk around campus and eventually go to Krave, expecting yummy frozen yogurt goodness. It was not as good as we had hoped. As we are at Krave, my parents call asking us to meet them in St. George for food. So we go and skip grilling. St. George was good. We get back to Cedar around 11. At this time, we realize that I had misplaced the key for the basement (where the water heater is). Frantically, we search for it and eventually find it. Within a few minutes my dad comes upstairs "What time does Home Depot close?". Well ladies and gents, it was not just the pilot light.. something was wrong with the stupid thermal coupler. So we go to Wal-Mart, praying that somehow they would have one. No such luck. Back at home, showering was a must as I had to work at 8 am. It was cold, to say the least. Ended up going to sleep around 2 am, no big deal. When I woke up at 7 and was getting ready for work, my dad had gotten the water heater fixed (though it would take some time before the water was actually hot) and was in the process of fixing the thermostat. I had to work a 4 hour shift then an 8 hour shift 3 hours after getting off, so during my break we decided to finally grill and I ended up taking a nap.
I have no idea how my weekend would have turned out if it hadnt had been for that gosh dang thermal coupler, but i kind of liked how it turned out. We had some great times. Now bring on the next 5 days of work so that I can go home to Vegas.
Well, the past two days have been interesting, to say the least. and ALL thanks to this little thing:
Yes, a thermal coupler. Thanks to this wonderful thing, my Friday and the rest of the weekend was changed.
First, my Friday was supposed to be simple. I was supposed to wait for the guy to come to fix my windshield, hang out with my little, and go to a play with Chelsea Lee. Simple, right?
Now, I will explain how things really went. Well Thursday night, my littles and I stayed up talking until about 6 am, and i followed that up by talking to my wonderful boyfriend until 9 am. I then, unknowingly, fell asleep. (really, I did not realize i fell asleep until I woke up). At 1 pm, I woke up. This is nothing out of the ordinary. What was out of the ordinary is that when I went to shower, the water was ICE COLD. and refused to heat up. UH OH!! So, as any daddy's girl would do, I ran to my phone and dialed up my fathers number. And, of course, daddy said he would come to my rescue. I am running around my house, cleaning, while I wait for the guy for my car. As I am doing so, I realize that my AC will not turn off (by this time my house is around 65 degrees and I am freezing). So, I call daddy again and he says he will bring up a new thermostat when he comes up for the water heater. As I am rushing around getting things done, I realize that a) my little is coming and with everything going on there was no way to BBQ and have fun like we planned and b) i had yet to go pick up my tickets for the play. YIKES! So since my parents were going to come up, I thought it'd only be right to not go to the play (I am utterly depressed over this. 2 years now missing the plays). So Chelsea and I ended up cancelling our plans. The guy fixes my window (horrible job, but that's another story) and I am able to finish up all other errands that I had to do. PHEW! As things settle down, my little arrives. We walk around campus and eventually go to Krave, expecting yummy frozen yogurt goodness. It was not as good as we had hoped. As we are at Krave, my parents call asking us to meet them in St. George for food. So we go and skip grilling. St. George was good. We get back to Cedar around 11. At this time, we realize that I had misplaced the key for the basement (where the water heater is). Frantically, we search for it and eventually find it. Within a few minutes my dad comes upstairs "What time does Home Depot close?". Well ladies and gents, it was not just the pilot light.. something was wrong with the stupid thermal coupler. So we go to Wal-Mart, praying that somehow they would have one. No such luck. Back at home, showering was a must as I had to work at 8 am. It was cold, to say the least. Ended up going to sleep around 2 am, no big deal. When I woke up at 7 and was getting ready for work, my dad had gotten the water heater fixed (though it would take some time before the water was actually hot) and was in the process of fixing the thermostat. I had to work a 4 hour shift then an 8 hour shift 3 hours after getting off, so during my break we decided to finally grill and I ended up taking a nap.
I have no idea how my weekend would have turned out if it hadnt had been for that gosh dang thermal coupler, but i kind of liked how it turned out. We had some great times. Now bring on the next 5 days of work so that I can go home to Vegas.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Crazy Girl
"Remember, true love is an act of will; it is not a feeling. Feelings come and go, but your ability to make a decision remains with you."
It truly is amazing how a quote can change your outlook. I've been thinking things through a lot lately. Have you ever been with someone and just pray that they open up and truly let you in? Have you ever hoped that they would just let you be part of their world. More than just a part in it, but actually welcome you in and let you got to know every aspect of them? You just wish to be included; you want to feel like you matter and like your opinion matters when it comes to their decisions. That's how I have been feeling lately. When I am with you, in a relationship with you, committed to you, I want to be a part of your life and part of your world. That's the great thing about dating someone at your school or someone that you have mutual friends with. That allows you to become a part of each others worlds. It allows you to truly grow, not just as individuals, but as a couple. It is something that I long for, and is why I envy each couple that I see around me. One thing that I do know, is that I have (at least according to me) a true love. I have someone who, even though we don't get to see each other, has made the decision to love me and to be with me.
“Love is not a feeling. Love is an action, an activity. . .Genuine love implies commitment and the exercise of wisdom. . . . love as the will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth.....true love is an act of will that often transcends ephemeral feelings of love or cathexis, it is correct to say, 'Love is as love does'.”
but i gotta say, i miss that adorable, cant get enough of each other talk.. the kind i had only a year ago. "i have the best girlfriend/boyfriend ever" statuses and a constant stream of mush coming from his mouth. I miss that boy who was always trying to impress me and always wanted to get to know my friends. those days were good.. those days are gone.
Sunday, June 19, 2011
Daddy's Girl
Red Sovine: Daddy's Girl
It is fathers day, and although he won't see this post, I felt it would only be right to dedicate a post to the wonderful man that is my father. So, first, I must express just how amazing my daddy is. (and yes, i call him daddy. I may be twenty, but until the day I die, he will be my daddy). He's the greatest
I won't sit here and tell you everything that he's encountered in his life, but know that it is a lot. The man who is my father, is the most influential, inspirational, man i have ever met. I am more than honored to call him my dad. So, again, from everything that he has been through, to where he is now, a father of four, grandfather, owner of a successful business, a professor/instructor (even if he quit i will still claim it for him), and one of the kindest and most understanding men you will ever meet. My daddy is, simply, amazing. He worked hard his entire life in order to provide for his wife and his children; to make sure that his family never had to go without food. Actually, my dad worked so hard that we got just about everything our hearts desired.
I can't imagine having to go through life without a father like him. I remember my mom, brother, and I hiding in my parents bed under the cover when we heard my dad pull up from work (for lunch, which happened every day) and staying there are quiet as we could be while he "searched" for us. I remember my daddy being there for me when i was a cheerleader and eddie was in football. For every holiday, birthday, recital, concert, and award ceremony, my dad was there, standing tall and proud. My dad bragged about me my whole life. From my grades, to the fact that I traveled with P2P (somehow that gives bragging rights in my dads eyes), to being salutatorian and going on to SUU and pursuing my degrees, my dad has always been proud of me and supported me.
I love my daddy so much. I can't imagine ever letting him down. For everything he went through to make sure that I have the very best in life, I can only thank him a million times, and make sure that I never let him down.
I know it's often said that a girl wants to marry a guy like her dad. And that's more than true in my case. I want to marry a man, as strong and loving as my father; a man who my children will look up to and admire for everything they have done. A man like that is extremely hard to find, and I hope that whoever I marry can be at least half the man he (daddy) didnt have to be.
HAPPY FATHERs DAY!!!
It is fathers day, and although he won't see this post, I felt it would only be right to dedicate a post to the wonderful man that is my father. So, first, I must express just how amazing my daddy is. (and yes, i call him daddy. I may be twenty, but until the day I die, he will be my daddy). He's the greatest
I won't sit here and tell you everything that he's encountered in his life, but know that it is a lot. The man who is my father, is the most influential, inspirational, man i have ever met. I am more than honored to call him my dad. So, again, from everything that he has been through, to where he is now, a father of four, grandfather, owner of a successful business, a professor/instructor (even if he quit i will still claim it for him), and one of the kindest and most understanding men you will ever meet. My daddy is, simply, amazing. He worked hard his entire life in order to provide for his wife and his children; to make sure that his family never had to go without food. Actually, my dad worked so hard that we got just about everything our hearts desired.
I can't imagine having to go through life without a father like him. I remember my mom, brother, and I hiding in my parents bed under the cover when we heard my dad pull up from work (for lunch, which happened every day) and staying there are quiet as we could be while he "searched" for us. I remember my daddy being there for me when i was a cheerleader and eddie was in football. For every holiday, birthday, recital, concert, and award ceremony, my dad was there, standing tall and proud. My dad bragged about me my whole life. From my grades, to the fact that I traveled with P2P (somehow that gives bragging rights in my dads eyes), to being salutatorian and going on to SUU and pursuing my degrees, my dad has always been proud of me and supported me.
I love my daddy so much. I can't imagine ever letting him down. For everything he went through to make sure that I have the very best in life, I can only thank him a million times, and make sure that I never let him down.
I know it's often said that a girl wants to marry a guy like her dad. And that's more than true in my case. I want to marry a man, as strong and loving as my father; a man who my children will look up to and admire for everything they have done. A man like that is extremely hard to find, and I hope that whoever I marry can be at least half the man he (daddy) didnt have to be.
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